As if anyone has been dying for this...

Long time, no post.  No real harm in that, since nobody even knows about this blog in the first place.  Not yet, at least.

But to all of those many viewers who have been waiting for another post, my sincerest apologies.  I shall now remedy the situation.

Let's see...  Brief update since January 2008?  I graduated from UGA, started working at Savannah Christian Church as a Elementary Ministry Intern, and have been doing so for around 6 months now.  Many other things happened...  Major things, but if I were to actually hunker down and try to type them all out I would become rather bored with myself, and that would be a shame.

So instead, you (again, assuming someone will eventually be reading these) will have to settle with hearing about my present.  Approximately 2 weeks ago I started dating Lauren "Lub Dubs" Winters.  For those of you that know us, you are probably thinking "finally."  Leave it as a thought, please, I've heard it before.  Despite the large portion of punkhood that went into the making of this relationship (99 parts my punkhood, mind you), I cannot help but look at it and see God's hand in the whole affair.  He is good.  Too good to me, but last I checked that is kind of how He rolls.

So, that's pretty big.  The SCC production "The Journey" also starts tonight.  For those of you that have never seen The Journey, just imagine a Christmas Story Theme Park.  The entire SCC campus is turned into an interactive theatre entirely focused on telling the story of Jesus' birth.  I am participating as a Joseph.  The best part: I get to do a little acting, which I haven't done in years (barring my ridiculous roles with the kids, of course).  The worst part: Patch Adams, as Lyle likes to call my beard.  God gave me a lot of things that I am very thankful for...  Ol' Patches is not one of them.  In two weeks, the razor will come out...  And I'll form this thing into

 something humorous.  I'll try to get pictures up of that sometime.

In a couple of days I will be giving my first "big boy" sermon.  Doug Hartley has been kind enough to give me the opportunity to teach in the high school ministry at SCC.  I'm a little concernicus, but hey, how hard can it be?  If anyone thinks that high schoolers are a tougher crowd than 5th grade boys, they are crazy.  In all seriousness, I'm excited.  God gave me my story for a reason...  Now perhaps I can share some of the comfort he has been so gracious as to give me.

I'll end this brief and insufficient 12 month update with a bang.  I'm out of my league, no?

I'm trying out for Scientology!

I pulled this from one of my favorite blogs: "Hey Jenny Slater" (listed as SEC Blog in my links section). These are questions from a Scientology Questionnaire.. And they are fantastic. I wonder what my score would be..

Have you ever enslaved a population?
Yeah, this is the first question. It will only get better.

Have you ever killed the wrong person?
No. If anything I've been letting too many of the wrong people live.

Have you ever torn out someone's tongue?

So.. Are these questions being asked in prison? Is that where scientologists try to convert people.. Because so far I’m killing, enslaving, and ripping out tongues.

Have you ever tried to give sanity a bad name?
Dr. Crazymind. Says it all.

Have you ever been a pimp?
Have I ever NOT been?

Ugh.. I’m sorry.

Have you ever eaten a human body?
Wow.

Have you ever been a professional executioner?
No, I’ve never done it professionally.

Have you ever set a booby trap?
I tried really hard to figure out how this makes sense. What kind of serious ramifications could there be to this? I mean, eating human bodies.. I get the ramifications. But booby traps?

Have you ever failed to rescue your leader?
No. Denise can always count on me.

Did you come to Earth for evil purposes?
I admit that I did, but I swear that I have changed my ways.

Have you systematically set up mysteries?
That seems to be your job. I feel like I’m having a conversation with the Riddler.

Have you ever zapped anyone?I’ve tried many times to get Righton to touch the electric bug zapper without success.

Have you ever had a body with a venereal disease? If so, did you spread it?
I hope that on the actual questionnaire this is the last question. The mention of STDs is always a great way to end a conversation.